I object to lack mentality.
Also, an upcoming show and reporting back from New Directions Cello Fest!
Next upcoming event:
Guest cello with Cradle of Judah
Boston, MA
July 12, 2024, 8 PM, O’Brien’s Pub
But first, a digression as per usual:
Cellists are the best ever.
The last weekend in June, I had the pleasure of being a guest artist at New Directions Cello Festival, a fabulous cello-centric happening that has performances, workshops, and jam sessions ‘til daybreak with dozens of uniquely wonderful non-classical cellists. This year it was just two hours away from my home in Boston in historic Northampton, MA, with performances at Bombyx Center for Arts and Equity in nearby Florence, MA.
The energy was BIG! Quirky, inspiring, fearless, and lots of other adjectives. To perform alongside Catherine Bent, Iva Casian-Lakos, Rupert Gillett, Jeremy Harman, and Ken James Kubota as a guest was a gift.
I hosted two brand new workshops – Building Worlds With Sound and Collaborating in the Recording Studio. Cellists really brought their A games into these workshops, which helped me learn more about how to best facilitate them. I’m so excited to do them again with more fresh faces!
When I was invited to New Directions, it dawned on me how long it’s been since I’ve hung out with a bunch of other cellists. I’m very much in my own world these days, which, as a mostly-hermit, I do tend to enjoy. But spending a few days surrounded by fellow cellos was so much fun.
I got to premiere a new piece which doesn’t have a name yet, but it’s roughly based around one of my musical death awareness meditation pieces, Nothingness is Impossible! It uses an amazing new pedal that was given to me by Electronic Audio Experiments, which is basically its own instrument. Combining that with cello, white voice, and Argent & Sable sounded nuts, gotta say.
The jam sessions after the shows were a blast. We’d find ourselves in blues grooves, gypsy jazz, tunes written by each other and our friends and teachers, soundscapes, these goofy slingshots of sounds punctuated by our laughter, gorgeous cello-istic rich yummy vast stuff, covers, weird shit, the whole lot. I can’t wait to return to New Directions and urge all my cello friends to come hang next year!
And now, back to your scheduled programming:
What is a “lack mentality”?
Lack mentality is the idea that there isn’t “enough” of something – time, money, energy, strength, space, creativity, skill, etc. It’s a neurotic perspective that sets us up for failure, disappointment, and no inner space to do what we want to do. It carves pathways for negative self-fulfilling prophecies.
Non-classical cellists have more of an abundance mentality than a lack mentality from what I’ve witnessed. We tend to understand that there is space for all sounds and souls. Everyone has something that we can all learn from. We’re humble students who really do simply enjoy our instruments and witnessing others doing the same.
Evidence of lack mentality in artists
Gonna try and do this somewhat Eckhart Tolle style. Let’s hedge toward cultivating the thought that aligns with reality; this is not about “thinking positive.” Here are some responses to common thought patterns I’ve witnessed in myself and other artists over the years:
“The market is too saturated for my music to be heard.”
I make art not to gain a foothold in the market, but to make art for its own sake. That is my purpose, simple as that!
I commit to honing my craft because it’s what I enjoy.
There is more than enough space for my art, your art, and their art. People consume bullshit all day every day, and since our art is in fact not bullshit, it has even more potential to be heard.
“There will always be someone better than me.” (Hello guitarists! Hello painters!)
…And?
Perhaps it’s time to name and practice the specific skills that will get you closer to making what you need to make instead of comparing yourself and hindering your desire/capacity to improve.
Are you making art to show off how “good” you are, or because you have something to say?
Come to think of it, why does art have to be “good?”
Check the tone you use when speaking to yourself. For example, “Ugh. I have so much to learn and practice. I’ll never have the time or energy to get that good,” as opposed to, “Ah! I have so much to learn and practice! I have endless entertainment!”
“I need more notoriety/exposure before I ask to get paid.”
Someone awesome talked about this at New Directions and it stuck (thoroughly paraphrased) – Do plumbers, teachers, or brain surgeons need exposure before getting paid? No, they need to pay back their student loans, get food, and have a place to sleep. So do you. You are also a person.
The darker reality: This is a construct that artists have been gaslit to believe so we can be turned into cash cows for parasitic corporations. This long standing mindset enabled late-stage capitalists to kneecap artists’ abilities to make careers.
We have the opportunity to shift culture by unanimously deciding to value our work monetarily. That is the conscious choice!
Art is a job like any other job. We’ve spent countless hours training for this job. You are in fact a worker, and you can act like one.
“I’m not talented enough to ‘make it.’”
I remember asking my cello teacher in college if I was talented. He told me the truth: “Talent” is a made-up concept. All individuals have natural aptitudes and leanings toward particular skills. If you want something, you commit inch by inch to it.
If you still have terms like “make it” in your lexicon, you still need to do the work of thoroughly defining what your version of success looks like.
“I need to have X before I can do Y”
Goals are one thing, arbitrary milestones are another. Are you setting intentions, or manufacturing speedbumps?
It can be useful to approach things from the perspective of the mediocre CEO of a high-powered company. They don’t ask permission for anything. “We need to gross over $30 million this quarter before I get my next yacht,”–hogwash. They buy the fucking yacht.
Could it be possible that you have (almost) everything you need? Is it your reality that’s holding you back, or an arbitrary sense of lack, or, even more crushingly, a fear of success?
I object to lack mentality
At some point, I abandoned my fealty to my culture’s obsession with victimhood. I got back to being a cellist – the presence that comes with practicing the craft for the sake of the craft. Presence became my definition of success. To be calm, focused, in flow, in the role of the observer and listener is to be very, very rich from my perspective.
For the last couple hundred years, we’ve seen our sense of attachment grow by way of the attitude of “more is better, most is best.” So if we don’t have or do or make more than our peers, we have a constant hunger, and it can paradoxically hinder our growth.
A challenge for artists
I still struggle with a lack mentality, and I’ve seen how so many of us creative folks do. It’s easy to lean into this and be the victim or the antihero in your artistic journey.
For a bit, I challenge you to get really vulnerable with yourself and do the following:
Journal on where your lack mentality comes from. Really sink into the “woe is me.” Feel bad for yourself! Didn’t land the audition? Soooooo sad. Nobody bought your art at the gallery? Sooooo terrible, how could it be. Etc.
Journal on your current reality. What is going well? What are your real setbacks? Where can you become more active in your work? How can you create more authentically and focus less on what you lack?
Rinse and repeat!
XXX